There are a hundred different reasons that chastity can be a high. It’s surrender. Connection. Discipline. Pain and pleasure wrapped up together. Longing. So much longing.
And there is a way in which is takes you deeper into your own body, your own pleasure.
Society spends so much time centering the penis in (and outside) the sexual experience. Everything—every touch, every word, every flirtation, every cuddle, every hug—is a step toward penetration or orgasm. Society tells you that you’re less of a man if you don’t want that specific type of sex every minute of the day. Sex is conquest. Dominance. Some core part of masculine identity.
I call bullshit.
That is the real cage. Not the one that holds your penis but the one that holds your potential for sensuality and whole personhood. The one that forces you into the tiniest box, ignoring your fullness.
The cage that keeps you from experiencing the pleasure centers in other parts of your body. The cage that keeps you from the intensity of denial, of edging, of embracing yourself as who you actually are—not just a cookie-cutter version of what society calls “man.”
In centering chastity, denial, or similar experiences, we have the opportunity to de-center the penis and find the pleasure outside it.
How does it feel to let arousal ebb and flow naturally without release? How does it feel to receive touch without forcing a journey toward orgasm? How does it feel to sink into longing? To wait (and wait, and wait) and then find release? Or to wait and never find it? No longer look for it?
And how does it feel when a goddess takes you beyond your own capabilities, pushes the waiting further than you can yourself, to a moment of intense release or deep forever-chastity euphoria?
The day you see a key around my neck, this is the journey I want to be on with a sub. A journey of power, control, and care for me and a journey of self-discovery for them.